First time ever! Available for the masses! Order yours now!

Be the first in your family, neighborhood, state, province, republic, country or outpost to have and fondle these sleek, smooth, sexy Fuck Doilies!

Get your silk charmeuse fabric doily in pink, white, black, bright red, or deep red. Not sure which color to get? Baubo's favorite color is pink. The guys tend to go for deep red.

Precious and prestigious sizes available.
Precious size is about 8-1/2 inches wide by 4-1/4 inches high.
Prestigious size is about 12 inches wide by 6 inches high.

Just in time for the holidays! Treat all your family and friends to the gift that keeps on coming, I mean giving, I mean that looks nice all year round.

Shown here is the precious size. See how supple it is! Smooth and silky, willing to bend to your every whim.

For more doily uses, you can also order the prestigious size. Perfect for that naked end table or bedside stand, just as smooth and silky as the smaller size and equally willing to whim bend.

Precious size is $29 plus $2.39 sales tax if you live in California and $2 shipping within the continental US.

Prestigious size is $39 plus $3.22 sales tax if you live in California and $2 shipping within the continental US.

If you want, just tell me what you'd like and I’ll send you an invoice. If you want 5 or more, please contact me first and I’ll make you a doily of a deal.

Pay using PayPal to lmappin ~at~ Metartmorphosis ~dot~ com. Soon, yes, we'll have buttons to make this easier. Send me a message with any questions whatsoever!

You may very delicately hand wash these doilies in warm water with gentle soap if they get sticky. Save the hard hand action for elsewhere.

Let's make fuck nice, acceptable,

always, always mutually consentual.

Lift the secrecy, talk about the risketry.

Be real with your partners. Be real. Be real.

Made in USA by MetARTmorphosis/Art changes you/Laura Mappin